Anonymous

I wasn’t looking for anything but I found does that make any sense? Quite a few things found me over break and not one of them had any slight dash of dehydration. Reason! I recently learned about dehydration and that is the number one cause of death in the United States. This began to frighten me so I compelled many including myself into drinking much, frequently at many times throughout the day. A week later I found that death is the number cause of dehydration as well. This scared me too but not as much as the first fact did.

During all of this drinking (done at my house or outside of it when I had water bottles) many people found me in a bed or outside or sometimes loading the dishwasher. I would stay up very late to load the dishwasher. The sluggish juice (who knew, right slugs?) that gilded the dishes was a negative point for doing that. But I had other reasons I did it, reasons that I enjoyed moving the dishes (from the sink into their racks). The racks were blue and the dishes were normally beige, with little brown marks on them. Wow. Wow. That’s what I would say to myself with each bowl I moved, rounding out my mouth as I fondled their lips.

With each piece of ceramic-ware I would imagine a little speck from the bottom of each piece flecking off, floating up from its carapace and into my ears and into my head. And these flecks were convening right at the spot behind my ear where that bone ends! Inadvertently, almost, like crusty stained rags wistfully finding the basement floor. And I developed this theory!

I think that these little flecks are making the bones behind my ears grow towards each other. Eventually, the two will touch and sever my brain (and my body, therefore) into two parts. My body and my cerebellum will remain together, and my face . The cerebellum fires the synapses for motor control so it would control my body just fine while my face would be connected with the cerebrum which controls complex thought.

So essentially this dishwasher unloading would lead to the disjunction of my thoughts from my body. These dishes would create a calcic barrier that would allow my body to indulge in its desires and my mind to satiate its intellectual thirsts simultaneously. The dishwasher, the kitchen weaponry of efficiency, creating a more efficient human!

Though I was thinking about this over winter break it did not happen. Weapons can’t make weapons just like fish can’t make fish. This found me too over winter break but now I have not only stopped looking for pugbits I have stopped finding them too. I just sort the pugbits I’ve already found and wait for them to find me again.